Marriage Matters

If you are married to a normal, healthy man, his greatest need in life is honor and esteem.

Men and women are equals-the Bible says we should serve one another-but one way a wife can serve her husband is by living out Ephesians 5:22. It says “Wives submit to your husbands as to the Lord.”

Submitting to your husband means honoring him. Honor and respect are like oxygen to a man. He gravitates toward it. He is invigorated by it.

Likewise, he’ll move away from a place where he doesn’t receive honor. Too many of the failing marriages I’ve seen have been rooted in a wife’s inability to honor her husband. That’s not the only reason marriages fail, of course, but it’s a common thread.

Honor is the key to a man’s heart. By requiring wives to serve their husbands, God is giving them the keys to their husband’s hearts.

One important way to honor your husband is by focusing on his strengths and not his faults.

I’ve heard it said before that the devil is the “accuser of the brethren.” There are five ways Satan accuses us. He is always accusing me to God, God to me, me to myself, me to you, and you to me.

Why? Because he hates relationships, and he wants to destroy those five important human relationships.

Any relationship you have with anyone will find itself under accusation from the devil for the purpose of dividing that relationship. This is especially the case with marriage.

To be happily married, both the husband and the wife have to learn to take their thoughts captive because the devil is always accusing you to each other.

Psalm 149:6-7 is an interesting scripture. It says “May the praise of God be in their mouths and a double-edged sword in their hands” to inflict vengeance upon the enemy. Praise is a weapon against the devil.

As Christians, we know the importance of praising God. But do we also realize the power that praise has in our earthly relationships? I defy you to praise your spouse all day long and still have angry or annoyed feelings about him.

Praise is a discipline that reminds us of what is right with each other and why we fell in love with each other.

Praise also leads to a positive outcome. As a husband, if you call your wife “gorgeous” multiple times a day, there will be a payoff. As a wife, if you tell your husband how handsome he is and that you’re proud of him, he’ll respond to it.

In other words, he may be doing ten things wrong and only two or three things right. But if you focus on the few things he’s doing right, you’ll be surprised at the result.

Submit to your husband “as to the Lord” by showing him honor. Honor him by focusing on what he’s doing right. By doing so, you’ll be meeting his number-one need.

Blessings,
Jimmy Evans

Photo courtesy of alicepopkorn

Marriage Matters

What are strong marriages built on? There are few better foundations for a marriage more than a sacrificial spirit – a spirit that enables a husband or wife to look at their spouse and say, “You are more important than me.” Want to protect your marriage against divorce? Put your spouse’s needs ahead of your own.

Every great relationship is a sacrificial relationship. Sacrifice is an ancient concept, going all the way back to the ancient Israelites and their relationship with God. He made a covenant with them – sacrifice for remission of sins – and then Jesus gave us a new covenant through his blood. He became the ultimate sacrifice.

Paul describes that covenant in Philippians 2, which starts off with two verses that married couples should have underlined and highlighted in their Bibles, and written on Post-It note reminders all over the house.

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” (Phil. 2:3-4)

I can’t come up with any better tip for married couples. If you want a strong marriage, live your life according to Philippians 2:3-4. Love your husband or wife like Christ loves us.

Couples who live together before marriage often struggle because they never learn to sacrifice for each other. Co-habitation is totally self-centered. It’s a tryout, a chance to get the benefits of a relationship without putting down tent stakes. Maybe she wants to know how good he is at taking care of her. Maybe he wants to know how good she is in bed. The whole relationship is performance-oriented - if you please me enough, I’ll marry you.

But a covenant marriage is built on the sacrificial example of Jesus Christ, who “made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant,” as Paul wrote in Philippians 2:7. A sacrificial marriage says, ”This is not about me and getting my needs met.This is about me giving my life for you.”
That’s the difference between a co-habiting marriage and a covenant marriage. That’s the difference between a marriage headed toward trouble and a strong, successful marriage. A good marriage – like a faithful follower of Christ – is never self-centered.

Blessings!
Jimmy Evans

Read more from Jimmy Edwards at www.marriagetoday.org.

Photo courtesy of sharaff

A brochure for He Saved The Day 2010 has been spotted at the Touch 10 Conference this evening!

For any husband whose wife has been at The River Dream Centre for Touch 10 this weekend, you’ll be getting one of these when she arrives home. The rest of you – stay tuned – we’ll have He Saved The Day information in your hand soon!

Registration for He Saved The Day 2010 opens on Friday 15th July. This years conference is on Friday 15th and Saturday 16th October.

Marriage Matters

In the parable of the sower, Jesus discusses how the Word of God hits some people’s hearts. Some people bear fruit for God as a result. But others do not bear fruit because they exhibit “thorny soil”–soil that is choked out by the cares of this world, the deceitfulness of riches, and the desire for other things. (Mark 4:1-20)

The issue of bearing fruit doesn’t only apply to the individual lives of believers, but also to marriages. Some men and women love God but their marriages are never great because they never bear fruit. Why not? For the exact reasons Jesus gave.

In this Marriage Builder, I want to single out the first main fruit-killer which Jesus mentioned, because it is one that affects almost all of us.

This marriage killer is stress, or as Jesus describes it, “the cares of this world.” We were not created to operate in stress. We were created to operate in peace. Marriages require emotional energy and stress robs us of that energy.

Have you ever had a particularly stressful day or week? Afterward, it’s hard for you to relate to other people, because you are worn out emotionally.

Bonding doesn’t happen because of proximity. You can’t just sit on a couch together watching American Idol. You have to interact. You have to get emotionally involved, and this becomes very difficult when your emotions are already worn ragged due to stress.

Because men and women deal with emotions so differently, the emotional side of marriage is hard enough to begin with. Add stress to a relationship and it becomes much an even greater challenge.

But stress doesn’t just hurt relationships emotionally. It damages them physically, too. The number-one sexual problem among women is inhibited sexual desire because of stress and physical exhaustion.

Being stressed-out is a sex-killer for both husbands and wives. That’s why couples tend to have the best sex when husbands help with the kids, or the dishes, or the housework. This is a turn-on for the wife because, among other reasons, it reduces her stress.

Stress can also be a health-killer. The primary reason for doctors’ visits today in America is stress-related illness. Stress even rubs off on our children, who intuitively know when their parents are stressed. Sometimes kids will even develop physical problems because they observe their parents’ stress and internalize it.

God did not create us to live this way. We are not supposed to be like those plate-spinners at the circus, who put so many plates in motion that, eventually, some of them begin to drop and break. When that happens, you have broken children, broken bodies, broken emotions, and broken marriages.

The rule for not letting “the cares of this world” affect your marriage is this: less is more. Are you trying to do too much? Have you taken on too many responsibilities at work, or even church? Are you putting your income or success above your marriage? Those are questions we need to ask and answer.

The best lives, and best marriages, will always be the simple ones.

Photo courtesy of WTL Photos.

Read more from Jimmy Edwards at www.marriagetoday.org.

A little about John Berriman:

Born at an early age! (1954) On a farm in St.Ives, a town that I have been in all my life except 2 years Dairy farming in Canada.

Brought up going to the Anglican church where I met my DDG wife when I was 15! (Don’t ask!) We both became Christians in 1988 after out marriage hit the rocks, big time. Started a new church in St.Ives in 1999 & now about to embark on planting 3 more in the next 10 years starting in Launceston.I was ordained an Elim minister in 2006 at Butlins (wow) (for the Butlins!). I have a passion for Marriage and the lost as well as those already in the congregation to live by the TRUTH of The Bible. I am in the process of writing a book (pray for me) called ‘The TRUTH, the whole TRUTH and nothing but a pack of lies.’

As a way of trying to earn a little money I have invented some new soft drinks using chillies! These are about to be re-launched under the brand name of Rev.Berriman’s. Oh dear, keep praying.

J.B.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=x21DQBLaRko

Why Men Don’t Apologise

Proud men don’t apologise. Why? Because you have to accept that you at fault and are taking responsibilty for that!

Embarrassed men dont apologise. Why? Because at best we dont want to admit or own our emotions and then talk about them. So when we feel bad or dumb or inadequate we go into our caves and hide rather than face reality head on.

Angry men dont apologise. Why? Because our anger deflects onto the other person we think has wronged us, we justify our actions and thus prevents us from seeing our part in the mess.

The soultion? Be humble! Men love posturing and this means we put up facades that present an overinflated false picture of who we really are. We act as if we’re not always right but we’re never wrong! We present a persona that says we are handling and coping with everything life throws at us. But under our Superman suit we are all just Clark Kent – human and as such we do make mistakes. Accepting your humanity is not wrong; it’s what you are. To act like you’re divine will alienate you from everyone but to accept this will mature you as a man.

Must I Apologise?

Yes, including when you are not totally to blame. Dont be the kind of guy that refuses to acknowledge your part in the offence and only aplogise when it’s 100% your fault. Remember it takes two to cause an offence and it’s rare that an offence is 100% one person’s fault.

Find and acknowledge your part in the offence and seek to understand yourself – why you did what you did. Understanding is the dorrway to growth and maturity. Justifying yourself is destructive and short-sighted which will negate any personal potential growth. While you justify yourself you may be destroying what is most precious to you. Some men choose to be right but it comes at a very high expense.

Normally owning up to your part in the relational breakdown will help the others involved to accept their part but even if they dont it doesn’t matter. At least you not held captive to their unwillingness to apologise.

Boys in big bodies dont apologise. Children hide under the bed or run away. Nothing changes. Big boys still hide or run away. A mantakes ownership of his faults whether there are unpleasant consequences or not.

Apologise as soon as possible because the longer you wait the more justified you will be become and the more hurt and resentful the other will be. Ignring an offence means sweeping it under the carpet but eventually everyone including you is going to trip and fall over that offence mountain under the carpet! The sooner you apologise the sooner the awkwardness can be dealt with and everyone can move on. A bit of humour also helps in the right context. Stop taking yourself so seriously and have a good laugh at yourself!

Don’t Apologise when standing up for your faith in Jesus Christ and the Christian values, standards and principles you uphold… as long as you dont defend yourself by acting like a moron! And if you do act like a moron then you’ve already lost your case and you should sincerely apologise. You have a right to your faith and even if people dont agree with it they should respect that.

Don’t apologise for not being perfect. Unreasonable people and unreasonable expectations should be called as such. If the expectation is unreasonable then say so and don’t apologise for it no matter how the other party tries to justify the reasoning behind their demands.

Dont apologise for every little thing. Being overly sensitive is a sign of certain insecurity and low self-esteem. No-one respects a compulsive apologiser and far from being manly it’s really emasculating.

9 steps for saying sorry like a man:

1. If you cant look them in the face then put it in writing.
2. Admit to others what they already know about you but just aren’t saying. It helps everyone.
3. Laugh at yourself. It helps others laugh with you.
4. Really apologise otherwise it’s not an apology at all. Do  not say I’m sorry but… That is not an apology. You have the right to explain but not the right to excuse yourself. Do not express sorrow for them being sorry. You are not admitting any fault and merely pouring petrol on the fire instead of water.
5. Explain why you are sorry because it expresses your understanding of the gravity of the situation, that you have thought about what you have done and what it means to you and others you have hurt. This tells the other party that you’re not just apologising because you have to.
6. When you apologise do whatever it takes to make right. If you don’t offer to make right then the apology is not an apology because it means that you are not taking responsibility for your actions.
7. Regret that you did what you did and communicate your wish to grow and do better in the future; that you have learnt from your behaviour. Where necessary get professional help.
8. Actions speak louder than words. If your words are not followed up with corresponding actions then it meant nothing at all. A man is a man of his word.
9. Fail forward! Go on living and do not live in regret. Being anchored in the past is for neutralised men. Life is for living.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=L11s56ALon0

www.youtube.com/watch?v=WG3wR96vJnY

www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuMZ73mT5zM

As promised, here is the video that had us all in laughter at He Saved The Day. Watch it here!

Hi all,

I just want to use the opportunity to thank God once again for being at the Men’s Conference.

I already sent an email earlier expressing my thanks to God and those people God used.

However, I just thought I should share this with you all.

Last night while I was back in the house I lodged and meditating on the things we were thought at the conference and praying during the course of the meditation, God showed me what I needed to do to reach out to my colleagues at work.
I will be pursuing that this week and it crossed my heart yesterday that God will reach out to all my colleagues through this means.

Also, I received last night confirmation about where God wants me to worship before relocating to Africa. This has been an issue for the last couple of months.

Lastly, while I was preparing for the conference on Friday, I was ironing my clothes and my iron stopped working.
I quickly checked if I could find the receipt/bank statement to show that I bought it at Asda but I couldnt.

I cycled to Asda but was told that I needed to get the receipt or a Bank Statement showing exactly the cost of the iron.

I couldnt find it so I left for the conference.
On saturday, during the break, i went to M&S in Exeter to see if I could get a new iron.
I already picked up the iron but thought to myself that I should get back home and check again if I could find the cost of the iron in my bank statement.

I got back home and checked but I couldnt find it..
I picked up the iron, to be sincere, i just picked it up, without thinking I touched the iron and thought that I should switch it on.
I did and it worked..

I am grateful to God for the fact that the iron worked.
although the iron cost £15 but I am too grateful to God and sensed I should share this with you all.
The same God that saved me from wasting another £15 is all powerful to save me from wasting millions and could use me to save lives from dying, businesses from failing and institutions and societies from wasting efforts on replacing things that still have long life.

Thank you God and thank you guys.

Love you all

Abraham

Browse the photos on Flickr in hi-res.

See all the photos from Day 1 of He Saved The Day on our Photo Album.

“Timing is the essential ingredient in success: Being the right man, at the right time, in the right place.”

“To educate a man in mind and not in morals is to educate a menace to society.”

“To read the Word and apply it to someone else is the letter of the law, and it will kill you.”

“To the degree that you become a good son to God, you become a good father to your children.”

“Too often men look only at images but are blind to issues.”

“True nobility is found in the dignity of real manhood.”

“Unbelief is the basis of sin. Pride is the strength of sin. Deceitfulness is the character of sin.”

“We can be one of God’s few successes or one of His thousands of disappointments.”

“What a man is in his manhood determines what he is in every other aspect of his life and relationships.”

“What God expects from a man is manhood.”

“What you believe is the basis for conduct, character and destiny.”

“When a man acts like a child, it forces his wife to act like his mother.”

“When we accept another man’s philosophy, which is a rationalization to justify his failure, we accept his failure.”

“Women want the same things in men that God wants: consistency, decisiveness and strength.”

“You become intimate with the one for whom you pray, with whom you pray and to Whom you pray.”

“You can be a professing Christian on Sunday but a practicing atheist during the week.”

“You can tell the character of a man by the friends he keeps.”

“You’re not qualified to lead if you cannot be led.”

“God commands us to commit to faithful men, then He makes them able.”

President Calvin Coolidge (1872-1933)

Reply from Tech Support

Dear Desperate Susan,
First, keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 was an entertainment package,
while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the command C:/
I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then
automatically run the applications: Guilt 3.3 and Flowers 7.5. But
remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to such background
applications as Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
Please remember that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create
Snoring Loudly.WAV files.
DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend
program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband
1.0. It could also potentially cause Husband 1.0 to default to the
program: Girlfriend 9.2, which runs in the background and has been
known to introduce viruses into the Operating System.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited
memory and can’t learn new applications quickly. You might consider
buying additional software to enhance his system performance. I
personally recommend Home Cooking 3.0 and Single Malt Scotch 4.5.
Finally consider applications such as Lingerie 6.9 (which has been
credited with improved performance of his hardware).

Good Luck
Tech Support

Dear Troubled User:
This is a very common problem that men complain about.
Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it
is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an
OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!!
It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend
7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from
the system once installed.
You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to
not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/
Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on
improving the situation. I suggest installing the background
application “Yes Dear” to alleviate software augmentation.
The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE!
because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before
the system will return to normal anyway.
Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high
maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as
Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 .
However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will
cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this
happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to
purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With
Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and
will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,
Tech Support

“The pattern of the prodigal is: rebellion, ruin, repentance, reconciliation, restoration.”

“The practice of prayer produces the power of prayer which produces a person of prayer.”

“The provisions of love are identity, security and stability.”

“The sequentially-ordered result of sin is guilt, fear and hiding.”

“The stronger a man is, the more gentle he can afford to be.”

“The sum total of a man’s life is: Stewardship, Relationship, Leadership.”

“The traits of true love are: Love of the Lord, Love of the brethren, Love of the Word, Love of the Lord’s fellowship (worship and prayer), Love of service, Love of the church, Love of ministry (ministers).”

“The truest Christian is always the finest gentleman.”

“The way we love others and our relationship to them is the evidence of our love for God and our relationship to Him.”

“There is a difference between being a covering and being a lid.”

“Things left to themselves naturally go to the devil.”

After I had been in England for a few years a denominational leader asked me whether I had yet embraced the English culture. My answer was not what he wanted to hear because I said ‘no I had not’ and ‘had no intention of doing so’. In Jn 6:6 Jesus said, “What is born of [from] the flesh is flesh [of the physical is physical]; and what is born of the Spirit is spirit.” Just as I had no intention of embracing my African culture so I did not any more want to embrace the English culture. I am intent in being a kingdom culture man!

When we talk about our definitions of masculinity we get our definitions from our cultures. Everything we are and everything we do is a product of our culture, so when we speak of African men, American men, English men we relate these particular men to their culture and this is dangerous because we are defining who and what man is naturally according to our cultures. What a man is in one culture can be very different to what a man is in another.

Today I want to go a little further from last week when we discussed who we are. Today I want to discuss our purpose – the why of we have been created to be by God.

1] God created the heavens and the earth.
2] God’s original plan was to manifest Heaven on the earth.
3] God’s plan or purpose was for man to manifest God’s kingdom rulership of Heaven on the earth.
4] God’s plan was for mankind to extend His kingdom rulership of heaven to the earth through mankind. It was never the intention of God for earth to come to heaven but for heaven to come to earth. Earth was never to define heaven but heaven is to define earth. Earth is to be established under the dominion of the Kingdom of God.
5] God’s plan was to establish a heavenly people on the earth. Earth is to be ruled by the culture of heaven. So God’s plan was to create a society of heaven on earth. Men of God should be called men of heaven. Wherever you are from you carry the culture from that place. So we know what English men are like, what african men are like, but what are heavenly men like? What are the values, moral standards and lifestyle of heaven? When Adam fell He declared independence from heaven so God says my ways are not your ways – what you call a man I do not call a man. You must become a kingdom man; we are not to display our country’s culture in the earth but we are to display heaven’s culture on the earth.

How do i know where you are from? By the way you speak – language! Jesus declared his first promise for those who believe in His name will be that they shall speak in new tongues. The most common language in this room should not be English but our heavenly language!

Jesus came to earth with one message – Matt 4:17 – repent for the kingdom of Heaven is at hand.
Matt 6:9 – Jesus said pray ‘thy kingdom come’ – in other words let your country come, let your culture, society, values, morals, standards, kingdom, government come to earth as it is in Heaven. Matt 6:33 Jesus said we must first seek His kingdom and then all other things will be added to us. You are supposed to manifest kingdom culture! Matt 10:7 Jesus tells His disciples to preach the kingdom of God.

A kingdom is the sovereign rulership and governance of a king over his territory impacting it with his will, intent and purpose. When we say the kingdom of heaven – a kingdom must come from a country. Heaven is an invisible county, a divine nation ruled by God. All nations have the same characteristics: a kingdom is characterised by territory, language, values, laws, ideals, culture, allegiance to one flag – this makes up a country. So when you colonise a nation the colony becomes just like the kingdom, so your manhood should not be defined by earth but by heaven.

What kind of culture are you allowing to operate in you and through you? Is your wife married to a British man or an African man or an American man? Or is she married to the personality of God? Who is she sleeping with…. a British man or an African man or an American man? Or is she sleeping with the personality of God? Are your children being raised with the culture of your natural nation and being given a religion as band aid to cover its evils or are you raising your children in the total culture of the personality of God? In kingdom of God culture? God never sent Jesus to give us a religion and if that is all you have while you live here on the earth you have missed God’s plan for man and men completely. If you live like all the rest of your unsaved countrymen but add your religion to the bad bits then you have missed it.

Lk 22:30 And as My Father has appointed a kingdom and conferred it on Me, so do I confer on you.

I grew up in a Christian family in Romania with twelve other brothers and sisters. I’m sixteen now. I had a normal life, as a child of Christian parents. I respected the Church’s schedule but as I grew up, I began to walk with friends from outside of the church and with the time I began to stay away from the church and maybe, away from God!

When I began to follow Jesus, I was in a camp together with other friends from a local church from my village. A man was preaching and I believe that while he was saying God’s words, I felt God’s love surrounding me and I fell on my knees and I began to weep. After that service, I went to the preacher and asked him to pray for me. That’s how I began to walk with God and I can say that there was very bad moments in my life.

After I was baptized with water, the time of wilderness came in my life, when I was tested by God. I failed in those moments somehow. There were sins in my life that I walked in before I turned to God. Sins like immorality, sins of a teenager. I began to walk in those sins again for a while. There were times when I felt God very far from me but also there were moments when I just danced before Him.

Thank God that He pulled me up from the miry clay of sin!

I grew up being forced to attend a methodist Sunday School together with my brothers. This turned me against ‘organised’ religion. I wasted my academic ability, at school,through laziness. Instead of going to Uni I left the 6th form before taking my A levels.

In November 2008 my wife and I attended her late father’s funeral, he was a treasurer of a Church of England church. The funeral was boring and I wished I was elsewhere. This must have been the turning point because the Go4God Church Barnstaple advert was on the household noticeboard for weeks before we attended in the New Year.

I’m more than happy we did go to Go4God in Barnstaple. The Word of God is amazing and meant for all of us. Faith, for me, is part of a process of growth and not a ‘one stop fix’.

Thank God He saved me from laziness.

Dr Ed Cole, father of the modern day men’s ministry, made an enormous statement, “Manhood and Christlikeness are synonymous.”

Most people when they begin to minister on manhood speak about their roles and responsibilities, and although good and well intentioned, this often puts the cart before the horse. We want to deal with ‘do’ before we speak about the ‘who’. This is like telling a bunch of school kids everything a dog does without revealing what a dog is and then telling the kids to draw a dog and you can imagine what they come up with left to their imaginations. This is much the same way in the church world. We tell men what they should be doing in terms of their roles and responsibilities and then we leave it up to them to ‘be a man’ with sometimes funny and sometimes very sad consequences. I have had the opportunity to observe several sincere men trying to ‘fulfil their roles and responsibilities as men’ but getting it so wrong because they’re trying to do something without knowing who they are first.

Rather than begin from experiences of masculinity, we need to first understand that of being made in the image of God.

Gen 1:26 God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness.

When the Word talks about being made in the image and likeness of God ultimately what is hidden behind the veil of the flesh will be far more important to us than the temporary veil of flesh which will go back to dust when we leave the earth.

1 Peter 3:4 calls this part of us “the hidden person of the heart”.

Jesus said that we are bipartite beings – the out man and inner man – “That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.” Jn 3:6

The apostle Paul said in 2 Cor 5: 16-17, “Therefore, from now on, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, yet now we know Him thus no longer. 17Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.”

We are created in the image and likeness of God as born again men of God. We are not what we were before we made Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour. Many men don’t know this. They have never been taught that ‘old things have passed away’ and that ‘all things have become new’. Other men have been taught incorrectly that they are just patched up sinners – sinners with a God-given band aid to cover our bad bits. But that’s not right. We are new creations that are now “partakers of the divine nature”.

1John 5:1 says, “Whoever believes that Jesus is the Christ is born of God.” If you have believed on the Lord Jesus Christ then the inward part of you is born of divine seed. 1John 3: 1-2 says, “Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God!… Beloved, now we are children of God.”

As believing men we MUST STOP identifying with who we used to be! We must stop selling ourselves short of who we are. We must renew our minds to the truths of God’s Word in what it says about us. Get rid of wrong thinking and wrong believing because it will cripple you from the best God has for you. If we don’t get this right we will be confused about who God made us to be and the enemy will continue to rob us all the days of our lives. We are born again men of God. We are children of God. You are a child of God! 1John 3:9 says God’s nature abides in us.

Col 1:27 says, “To them [His saints] God willed to make known what are the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles: which is CHRIST IN YOU.”

Beloved men, based on these irrefutable truths of God’s Word concerning us, every one of us is more than enough to the task of being men.

We just want to let you know about the accommodation available at this year’s He Saved The Day conference. We’ve been working with Jury’s Inn, Exeter, and have secured a rate with them of £45 per room per night.

A room can sleep 2 – 3 men, meaning the cost will be reduced per person. This is a new hotel which is situated very near the city centre, and is only a short walk from The River Dream Centre.

To book your room, either email us at info@hesavedtheday.com, or call Olav on 07595 999 789.

I was born on a little farm just out side of St.Ives, on the Zennor road called Trevessa. My father used to be a lay preacher in the Methodist chapel but in sixties moved to the Anglican church at Halsetown, St.Ives.

I went to church most Sundays and was a choir boy. It was at this time that a family turned up at church for a christening. What brought my attention to this family was a young girl that caught my eye! She was, I learned afterwards, called Sally, her parents were dairy farmers from Lelant. Church began to get very interesting! After we were married we didn’t attend church very often. After a couple of years we were expecting our first baby, I was a very happy man.

One busy day in February, Sally was felling sick. She went to the doctor who said that it was a bug and that there were a lot around. On getting home Sally was sick and became unconscious, having fits and throwing herself around on the floor. I came in and found her. I called 999 & the ambulance arrived as did the doctor and Sally, 37weeks pregnant, was rushed to Truro in ambulance followed, very nervously, by me driving the doctors car.

Sally was rushed into the theatre and after I had signed that they could do what ever necessary to save her, they carried out an emergency caesarean section.

I was beside my self! What if she dies? What about the baby? After a short wait I was told that I was a dad, and that Anna had been placed in the Special care Baby Unit. She was asleep because of all the drugs that had to be used to drop Sally’s blood pressure.

I remember going in with my mother in law to see Sally in a very dark room. There was a nurse there and Pam asked what the prognosis was. The nurse indicated that she was not supposed to tell us anything to which Pam replied “its ok I’m a pharmacist and I understand these situations”.
The words that then came from the nurse’s mouth will be with me forever. She said “In these cases it is usually the baby that dies first!”

That was it. What could I do my world had been torn apart & I was totally lost. Thankfully they both survived and we had Anna christened in the small Towednack Anglican church. I had vowed never to have any more children but on 22nd Feb some 2 years later George was added to our family.

Life was good. But I was working all hours. My father had retired and we were running the dairy farm. I would often be up to milk the cows at 6 andthen off for a days contracting often not returning home until 10- 11 o’clock at night. To do the same the next day. This was no fun for a young mum who had to look after 2 tiny children as well as organise the events on the farm when I was not around. Circumstances Changed and because of our actions we suddenly realized that we were in a mess, BIG TIME! OUR MARAGE HAD HIT THE ROCKS.

We had both been neglecting each other and needed to sort things out. We went to see John Harper the guy that married us as we figured that if he put us together then he could mend us!

I remember he asked me a question? “Do you read the bible?” “No” I responded “but I do occasionally read a hymn book!” Why I said this I do not know but it seemed good at the time! He spoke some God stuff into my life and I didn’t really know what was going on but I wept buckets. (It was as if God was cleaning me from the inside!)

Several nights later I was in bed with Sally and although we were only inches apart it felt like 1000 miles, I said this prayer, “‘Dear God, I don’t fully understand all that is going on in my life BUT if you are real would you come into my life in Jesus name Amen.”

I awoke the next day and I felt good. I said “hello” to the work chap who was working on some machinery, and then it happened: he dropped a spanner or something and said the name “JESUS”  and I went “WHAT WAS THAT!” It was as if someone had stabbed me in the heart. I had heard blasphemy before but now it hurt me and I knew something had changed. I had become a Christian.

That was when the He saved the Day for me. He rebuilt our marriage and transformed our lives. Praise His Name.

When we are born with male physiology it defines and indicates the role God wants us to assume while we’re here on the earth. God created male.

The worshipper and king, David, uttered these words by the Holy Spirit:

For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
14I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvellous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
15My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
16Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.
17How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
How great is the sum of them!
18If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand;
When I awake, I am still with You. Psalm 139:13-16

God was involved in your coming into being. His finger is found in the very fabric of your DNA, in the microscopic building blocks of who you were to be. In His awesome omnipotence, omniscience and omnipresence, He decided that you were to fulfil His eternal purposes and your purposes in the earth as male. Your male physiology is not the design of man but the design of almighty God and David was appreciating and celebrating God’s handiwork.

Not one of us is a physiological biological cosmic accident or the intentional design of 21st Century methodology or medicine. In Luke 1 it records the story of the birth of John the Baptist: “There was in the days of Herod, the king of Judea, a certain priest named Zacharias. His wife was of the daughters of Aaron, and her name was Elizabeth. 6And they were both righteous before God, walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless. 7But they had no child, because Elizabeth was barren, and they were both well advanced in years. 8So it was, that while he was serving as priest before God in the order of his division, 9according to the custom of the priesthood, his lot fell to burn incense when he went into the temple of the Lord. 10And the whole multitude of the people was praying outside at the hour of incense. 11Then an angel of the Lord appeared to him, standing on the right side of the altar of incense. 12And when Zacharias saw him, he was troubled, and fear fell upon him. 13But the angel said to him, “Do not be afraid, Zacharias, for your prayer is heard; and your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you shall call his name John.

The story is keen to tell us the name of Zacharias, the name of Elizabeth and the instruction of the angel from God to call the yet “unconceived” and unborn child – John. This is the intent of God displayed on the canvas of human flesh. The story of Jesus is no less spectacular in Matt 1, “Behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take to you Mary your wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. 21And she will bring forth a Son, and you shall call His name JESUS.”

The account of the Spirit is recorded for your and my benefit so that we will discover our purpose while here on the earth. Our first mother and father are known to us by name – Adam and Eve – male and female – masculine and feminine – man and woman. In our cosmetic surgery driven culture fuelled by our relentless pursuit for eternal youth we have adopted the world’s system of values with regard to ourselves. In order to buy their products and services we loath and hate ourselves. Some hate themselves so much because the delusion over their minds is so great they go as far as changing their very gender. satan will do anything to deface that which is created in the image and likeness of God. Have you bought into his system? Do you love you? Are you shy, embarrassed, insecure or fearful of God’s original masterpiece called you? Ps 139

“The formula for success in real estate is: location, location, location. The formula for a successful marriage is: communication, communication, communication.”

“The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.”

“The man who seeks to please God is the man who people are pleased with. The man who seeks to please others won’t satisfy anyone.”

“The more you build your life on principle and less on personality – yours or others – the straighter will be your course.”

“The only man in a church that is given the responsibility to disciple the men is the pastor. The pastor disciples the man; the man disciples the family.”

“The only Scripture you believe is the one you obey.”

I trust these inspire you this week,
Pastor Michael

P.S. Have you shared your testimony with us yet of how He Saved Your Day? If not, tell us here.

I was a clubber into the house scene in the midlands during the mid 90′s. I got interested in voodoo and black magic. I called spirits into me in order to do ouija and to access the voodoo spirits. Thankfully God warned me what I was getting into – after trying to find something to help me escape all the spirits I had called in I looked through a bible – saw in the bible about “passover”. I did not know what it was but I sure wanted some help as I wanted the spirits that were on me to passover!

One day I was sitting in a pub and I heard a voice say “are you ready to meet someone?”. I looked around the voice was in me around me so strong – it was the voice of God. In my heart I said Yes! The next day I was on a train I heard two men talking about Jesus like he was real. I asked these guys when we got to the station to help me – I said “I had been invloved in some scapes!”  I prayed a prayer and asked Jesus to be my saviour and I accepted that he had died on the cross for me and my sins.

As I called Jesus into my life – my legs gave way – I was very dizzy – as God came into my life – since then I have grown in the Lord – got to know Him – he has given me a new life – a wife – a family – a career – a new path away from drugs – the occult – sleeping around and trying to please people all the time.

Thats my story of how He Saved The Day !!!

From a young age I always thought I had believed in God but it was more like believing a story than a reality. I had prayed for things and was a typical ‘good’ boy who didn’t get in trouble and tried hard at school.

My parents divorced when I was thirteen which is a hard age for a boy when he is starting to find himself. I suddenly became the ‘man’ of the house and felt like I had to step up to fill my dad’s shoes. The reality was I was still a boy and failed miserably.

I lost a lot of my self worth through this and began going out drinking with mates. Being a rather hairy lad I didn’t have trouble being served in pubs at 14 with a beard, meaning there would be many nights when I had drunk far too much causing all sorts of mischief, leading to a lot of regrets. I didn’t get the grades I was capable of at school and was at a bit of a lost end. I lived this life for a few years, just floating from one day to the next without any real goals to aim for.

When I met my beautiful wife Susanna, through our many conversations in our friendship before we started dating, she asked whether I was a Christian. I said yes, still believing this was true. However, once we started dating I realised how far from the truth this actually was. Going out night after night drinking and the types of places I was going were nowhere near ‘Christian’. I had to change.

Susanna had been ill for the first eighteen months of our relationship, in bed for most of the day, with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome following Glandular Fever. She had been in hospital a couple of times and when shopping sometimes had to be pushed around in a wheelchair. God completely healed her in a meeting we went to in Birmingham. From one day being in a wheelchair, to the next playing basketball for a couple of hours with me being the one having to stop because I was knackered. God was now a reality!!

We got married a couple of months later and moved to Exeter. I became depressed following our tough first two years of dating and the pain of my parent’s divorce really hit me. I again slipped back into the old trends, drinking heavily and not feeling like I had a purpose. I needed God, desperately.

Finding the River Dream Centre was the best thing that has ever happended for me and Susanna. Rather than judge me I found I had real friends and Pastors who encouraged and guided me, leading back to the realness of God. I am now moving forward and feel that over the past two years I feel I have grown tremendously. I am now able to serve in the Church I love and thank God for what he is doing in my life every day. I still have a long way to go but with God’s grace I will win the fight.

And the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon,
Little boy blue and the man in the moon.
“When you coming home, dad?” “I don’t know when,
But we’ll get together then.
You know we’ll have a good time then.”

My son turned ten just the other day.
He said, “Thanks for the ball, dad, come on let’s play.
Can you teach me to throw?” I said, “Not today,
I got a lot to do.” He said, “That’s ok.”
And he walked away, but his smile never dimmed,
Said, “I’m gonna be like him, yeah.
You know I’m gonna be like him.”

And the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon,
Little boy blue and the man in the moon.
“When you coming home, dad?” “I don’t know when,
But we’ll get together then.
You know we’ll have a good time then.”

Well, he came from college just the other day,
So much like a man I just had to say,
“Son, I’m proud of you. Can you sit for a while?”
He shook his head, and he said with a smile,
“What I’d really like, dad, is to borrow the car keys.
See you later. Can I have them please?”

And the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon,
Little boy blue and the man in the moon.
“When you coming home, son?” “I don’t know when,
But we’ll get together then, dad.
You know we’ll have a good time then.”

I’ve long since retired and my son’s moved away.
I called him up just the other day.
I said, “I’d like to see you if you don’t mind.”
He said, “I’d love to, dad, if I could find the time.
You see, my new job’s a hassle, and the kid’s got the flu,
But it’s sure nice talking to you, dad.
It’s been sure nice talking to you.”
And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me,
He’d grown up just like me.
My boy was just like me.

And the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon,
Little boy blue and the man in the moon.
“When you coming home, son?” “I don’t know when,
But we’ll get together then, dad.
You know we’ll have a good time then.”

I’ve got a pretty good idea what my life would be like without God… Boring.  More than that, I’d be facing him without forgiveness and that’s a scary thought!

God has convinced me through my family, through friends, local church life, hard times as well as overwhelming historical evidence that Jesus really did die for us and rose again from the dead so that we can have forgiveness, peace with God and life to the full now and forever and this is why I’m still a Christian today.

I still struggle with my own selfish thoughts and actions each day but I’m free to live my life for God now and I struggle onwards in his strength to use every opportunity I can to love him and to love others so they can leave their own ‘boredom’ and know God for themselves.

Everything is an adventure now.  I’m free from guilt because I’ve got forgiveness from God and I’m free from boredom because he’s called me to do great things for him.  Bring it on!

“Success is not based on the ability to say yes but on the ability to say no.”

“Television is like a thief. It steals time; it kills initiative; it destroys relationships.”

“The absence of prayer is testimony to your ability; the presence of prayer is testimony to God’s ability.”

“The closer to God a man is, the more of a man he is.”

“The common man stops the habit of study or reading after his schooling, but the uncommon man continues to read and study all through life.”

“The difference between men who succeed and men who fail is in their ability to handle pressure.”

“The father’s responsibility is not to make the child’s decisions but to let the child observe the father’s decisions.”

I trust these inspire you this week,
Pastor Michael

P.S. Have you shared your testimony with us yet of how He Saved Your Day? If not, tell us here.

Just before I started college, I started coming to the River Dream Centre, and Pastor Michael’s messages completely changed my approach to God, and life in general. Nine years later, I know I have walked a completely different path to what I would have without the injection of purpose and direction that a real relationship with the living God gave me. My life is more exciting, fulfilling, and stretching than it ever would have been without the challenge of reaching for a life that meant more.

The realisation that my Creator has made me for purpose, for playing a part in something much greater, and that this purpose is the most fulfilling thing I can possibly do, has changed my life. Although its not a dramatic “road to Damascus” type testimony, it means the world to me, because I know I would be broken, struggling, compromising and frustrated if it wasn’t for God who stepped in to save the day.

My testomony starts about fourty years ago just smoking dope and weed for weekend fun. The next thirty years that followed was not as much fun, I was involed in drug importing selling crime of all sorts what ever it took to stay off my face. I lost my first wife and daughter, friends and family at this point in my life. To put it mildly, I was one son of a, you know what. Then about twenty years ago my life took a big dive – I found myself in the gutter with a heroin habit, and at that point I felt down and out. Yet  God did a wondrous miracle – He spoke to me and He told me that He’d look after me and supply my needs – and over the years he has restored all the things I lost.

What every man wants to know is do I measure up? Do I have what it takes? Am I enough? Will I be enough? Will I be acceptable and accepted when I enter the company of men in their world.

When life demands that it makes a withdrawal from my life whether it’s having to defend myself on the playground, navigate a job loss, a threatened breakdown of marriage, the loss of a child or a terminal illness – either my own or a loved ones, or the death of a parent what will I do? Life will make withdrawals from everyone of us. Will we rise and deliver as men? As we enter different phases of our lives we are continually asking ourselves questions that haunt us like dark shadows on the walls of our minds.

As a boy I don’t want to be a sissy. As a student on the school playground I don’t want to be the weakling every bully mocks and torments to make me the laughing stock and ridicule of cruel judgmental eyes.

As testosterone begins to pierce and disintegrate the core of my boyhood and reframe it into the image of outward manhood I beg that I won’t develop late, that my genetics will respond to this activation and make me big so that I can hold my own in the locker-room. Perhaps I will even be admired and accepted because the genes of my ancestors have been kinder to me than the timid who won’t get changed in front of the others.

As my interest and attraction for the opposite sex awakens and sometimes occupies and fills my mind with an altered state of consciousness that spills over into my body and causes untold embarrassment at the most inappropriate times and places I wonder if I measure up for them against the background of all the subliminal images society feeds both of us.

As I contemplate engagement and marriage I take courageous steps mustering all the bravado I can that says I will fulfill all my promises I have made to you and meet your expectations of who you have given your life to. Inwardly this adventure carries with it the awkward voices of reality – the train smashes of broken promises and lives that never made it to their destination – but I comfort myself with youthful arrogance that lacks self insight that says I’m different. I’ll make it. But I wonder if can really walk the talk.

My children appear before me miraculously. The products of a moment of passion shot from my loins and now manifesting themselves through the delivery room of my wife’s womb. I tell myself that although I’m able biologically, am I ready to be a father? I invoke all the secret promises I made along the journey of my childhood that I will not be like my father who brought private and public pain into my life and although now grown up I still smart from his wounding fed by the underground rivers of anger. But how will I rightly father from empty, broken, wounded places where I myself still long for missing pieces to be put into my life?

Seasons change and as I enter my forties and my children leave home I begin to assess my life wondering with startling bewilderment why am I late? I should be further down the road than I am right now. But my job has emasculated me. My body begins to tell me that I am not what I used to be in the strength and glory of my youth. Younger men look at me with hungry eyes that surround me like a pack of wild dogs ready to seize on its prey at the slightest wrong move. They remind me that I’m late. I look at this woman called my wife and we’ve both been so busy building a life that we forgot each other. Who is she? With a heavy dose of realism will we navigate this bend in the road successfully or will we be another statistic? As I assess my life I no longer value the gathering of temporal things to myself as of paramount importance anymore. I am looking for significance. Relevance. Will I live on in the hearts of others long after my departure from this earth? Will l leave a legacy?

As I enter old age and finally drop out of my flesh and my mind I survey the landscape of my life from the eyes of my spirit. The reality of my departure from this earth more real to me than ever before as I attend my friend’s funerals which forces me to impart important things I have gleaned from life’s experience. If only I realised that this was not a dress rehearsal. Not one day of my life. Everyday mattered. But I cannot turn back time.

These scenarios are not meant to depress or create despair. They paint pictures of men in different seasons of his life and every season demands an answer to the question, ‘How did I measure up?’ After I followed the counsel of well meaning advisors did it empower me to answer the questions successfully. Today is enough to meditate on this.

“God commands us to commit to faithful men, then He makes them able.”

“Guide, Guard, Govern – Direct, Protect, Correct – Nourish, Cherish, Admonish – Visionary, Administrator, Ruler – Prophet, Priest, King”

“How can a woman be the glory of the man unless that man is becoming the glory of God by being conformed to the image of Christ?”

“Reasonable men adapt to the world around them; unreasonable men make the world adapt to them. The world is changed by unreasonable men.”

“Some men ‘happen’ to influence, but leaders ‘determine’ to influence.”

“Start where you are with what you have.”

I trust these inspire you this week,
Pastor Michael

P.S. Have you shared your testimony with us yet of how He Saved Your Day? If not, tell us here.

We know that every man want to make a difference – to know that his life counts for something. We know that every man wants to be inspired – to be encouraged deep within him that he is well able to take the land. And we know that every man needs his comrades, his brothers-in-arms, who will fight the good fight of faith with him shoulder to shoulder.

One of the ways that you can give this to other men at He Saved The Day is to share your story with us of how He Saved Your Day. Already there are plenty of testimonies of how men were saved from death, sickness, sin, and culture of the day. You can read them all here.

We want to inspire you that your story does matter. Revelations 12:11 says “they overcame the enemy by the blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony” – the words of victory of God Saved Your Day have a resolve and power that overcomes.

So come over to hesavedtheday.com, and tell us your story, because we men need to here it.

“A man who lives on a level below what God intended is a slave to desires he doesn’t like, is ruled by spirits that hate him and is destined to be lost to the presence of God for eternity.”

“A father’s responsibility is not to make the child’s decisions, but to let the child watch him make his.”

“Daniel’s Attributes: Unashamed Boldness; Uncommon Standard; Unearthly Protection; Unhindered Persistence; Unblemished Faith; Unusual Test; Immeasurable Blessing; Unlimited Influence”

“Every man has three men to deal with: the man he thinks others see, the man he thinks he is and the man he really is.”

“Every man is limited by three things in life: The knowledge in his mind, the worth of his character, the principles upon which he is building his life.”

I trust these inspire you this week,
Pastor Michael

P.S. Have you shared your testimony with us yet of how He Saved Your Day? If not, tell us here.

He saved the day for me when I was 16 years old. My years before that were a bit of a train crash waiting to happen. Between drink, drugs, joy riding, fighting and shop lifting there wasn’t much room for Jesus in my life.

My mother and father had divorced, which caused me to give up on life. My main aim was to do as I liked, no matter what the cost to myself or others. My mother tried her best to raise me as a single parent, between her and my sister they were frequently taking me to hospitals and getting me out of police cells.

In November 2001 my mother decided to take me to Disneyland as a treat. We went out to the states for 3 months, she was working with a Church as a worship leader, with the aim of visiting Disneyland on our return journey.

As the weeks went by, there was no real change in the way I looked at the church, although I had made a few very important Christian friends, there was no real concern for God. I met a few people that were into smoking weed and drinking and hung out with them instead.

So finally the time came for Disneyland, I was so excited by the thrill of going but God was the last thing on my agenda. I think it was the second night in our hotel room, I was really bored and my mum was sorting stuff out for the next day.

So I decided to sit out on the balcony and listen to my CD player, as I sat there I felt the urge to go and get a CD about the prayer of Jabez. I sat listening to it, but I didn’t really know what it was about or why I had chosen it. As the music played I started to cry, tears rolling down my cheeks, I started to think about what Christ had done for me, I felt the Lord come down on me and it was like he was holding me in his arms and embracing me as a father. Instantly I knew that God was real and that after all he had done for me, my life was to be lived for him.

I came back in to the hotel room beaming from ear to ear, I told my mum what had happened and she was over the moon with joy and thanksgiving, she had been praying for me to find Jesus for many years.

As I return to the United Kingdom and to the life I had left behind, I was a completely changed man. My friends could not understand what had happened to their rebellious friend, who was always game for trouble and now wanted to go to church.

Didn’t want to get drunk anymore, didn’t want to get high, didn’t want to steal things.

Through God’s work in me, 2 of those friends have given their lives to the Lord.

Thank you Father for saving my day, that day in Disneyland.

1. God is a Spirit; Although a ‘Person’ He is not contained within a human body and is neither male nor female (John 1:18, 4:24, 6:46; Num 23:19).

2. Humanity is created in God’s image and likeness and therefore male and female both reflect the image of God in different and unique ways. Men bear the image of God in a distinctly masculine way, and women bear the image of God in a distinctly feminine way. (Genesis 1:26-27)

3. Men and women are equal as image-bearers of God. They however play different roles in the working out of God’s purposes on earth. The charge given to the first man and woman was multiplication and dominion – “fill the earth and subdue it” (Gen 1:28). The man’s earthly or natural role falls more heavily on the dominion side of the mandate – subduing the earth by the sweat of his brow (Genesis 1:28, 2:15-25; 3:17-20). The woman’s earthly or natural role falls more heavily on the multiplication side of the mandate – the bearing and raising of children (Genesis 1:28, 3:16). Neither role is independent or possible without the other but rather complimentary, which is why the union of man and woman in marriage provides the clearest picture of God’s image in humanity (Genesis 2:24).

4. God uses masculine pronouns to refer to himself throughout Scripture – not because God is physiologically male but rather God wants to emphasise His headship and authority over all creation; as the man is the head of a marriage, so God is the head of everything in creation (1 Cor 11:3; 1 Tim 2:12-13).

5. When Jesus, the second person of the Trinity, stepped into the earth, He took on human form as a man – Jesus of Nazareth – not because man is superior to woman but because of the role Jesus played in redemption – rescuing humanity from sin and executing the demands of covenant headship, reversing the failure of Adam – all a distinctly masculine role. It was a man’s abdication of headship that got humanity into trouble (Genesis 3:1-7; Romans 5:12) and it is Jesus’ faithfulness, the second Adam, as our covenant head that redeemed us (Romans 5:17; 1 Cor 15:45-49).

How do we therefore relate to God?

a) We worship God for both His masculine qualities such as protector (Psalm 121:7), provider (Genesis 22:14), fighter (Psalm 3:7), defender (Isaiah 38:6), and Saviour (2 Samuel 22:3), as well as His feminine qualities such as comforter (Psalm 23:4), helper (Psalm 54:4), and lover (Isaiah 40:11) and His tender mercies and lovingkindness (Psalm 25:6). [This is not to say that women never fight or defend, or that men are never tender and compassionate.] Also, and perhaps more importantly, any of these qualities are appropriate to either gender in the discharge of our roles in the right context.

b) It is however wrong to think of God as female, because this is contrary to His self-revelation in Scripture.

c) Because God, through the person of Jesus Christ, came to earth as a man, it is right to think of Jesus as male and to worship Him for His masculine covenant headship which is the ground of our salvation.

d) Jesus in His humanity is the consummate masculine leader – the perfect Man – and therefore our view of true masculinity should start with him. All godly men should emulate Jesus. “Manhood and Christlikeness are synonymous”, said Dr Ed Cole.

e) Jesus was also the perfect human, 100% human and 100% God, and therefore also sets the standard for godly women. Jesus’ submission to the Father models what a woman’s submission to male headship should look like. As godly men should seek to emulate the spirit and example of Jesus, so should godly women.

f) Scripture gives us both male and female role models to emulate. The virtues of courage (Joshua 1:1-9), sacrifice (Ephesians 5:25), and hard work/provision (1 Tim 5:8; 2 Thess 3:7-12) are held up as some of the marks of godly masculinity. Peter specifically mentions the virtue of submission as a mark of godly femininity (1 Peter 3:1-7). While our definitions of masculinity and femininity are influenced by our cultural presuppositions, God has given us a clear outline of masculinity and femininity, based in his own creation order which ordained that men and women should bear his image in distinct yet complimentary ways.

On starting uni last October, I was lusting after ‘the student lifestyle’ and wanted to show everyone I was a real ‘Essex Boy’. I wanted to get drunk, get laid, get high. Then after losing myself in a world of sin, I wasn’t even looking to go to Church, read my Bible or even take time to talk to God. Then my pastors back in Essex nagged at me to go to the RDC. Halfway through the second term I finally went. After a shakey second term, God turned my life upside down at Spring Revival Conference.

First of all He made me choose between him and the drink and drugs, then He knocked me off my feet and filled me with the Holy Spirit. All of a sudden, I was on fire for God at last, I wasn’t looking for the sex and every sinful thing the Essex culture tells me is normal. I was looking for ways to become a more Godly man, actually just being a man and not a boy was the important thing!

Now I am walking with Jesus. God has saved me from everything I thought was acceptable before. That, in my journey with God, has been the greatest thing He could save me from. I’m just so thankful that my old ways didn’t completely rob me of my purity.

Thank you Lord!

The reality was there was nothing special about me.  I was held back a year at school, didn’t excel at any particular sport; I loved adventure and fun but often struggled with loneliness and depression.    I guess I always believed in ‘God’ but I just saw him like a maths equation, which exists but holds no value or relevance in my life. When I went to college I attended some Christian events, mainly because of a girl I liked. I meet some people that had a real God and over the course of a couple months He became real to me.  I found out that Jesus was a lot different to most of the wimpy, buck toothed, boring losers that called themselves Christians and had previously formed my opinion of Christianity.  Jesus was full of life, adventure and was literally down to earth; this was the kind of guy I could go with.  Best of all Jesus could turn my life upside down and change me inside out.  I not only have more adventure and zeal for life than ever before but he healed my brokenness and touched my mind in an incredible way.  When He came into my life I kissed goodbye to mediocre manhood!

He saved me; He healed me; He gave me purpose.

My testimony is not a dramatic, overnight transformation but is that of a man slowly, but surely finding himself, his God, and his purpose.

I had what you might call a typical, “Christian” upbringing – I went to Sunday school, I went to church each Sunday, sang a few hymns, said a few prayers and then went back to enjoying my life throughout the week. I was quite content believing in God and living life for my pleasure.

During my final year in High school God became more real to me than ever before at a Christian conference called Spring Harvest. I stopped getting drunk, stopped swearing and wanted to do what He wanted me to do. The problem was, I didn’t know what He wanted me to do. I still went to church but the church I went to didn’t really tell me how God was relevant to me and my life.

A major change came when I went to college and met some other Christians who went to another church. When I visited this church I was blown away. There was no religious tradition, no hypocritical preaching of laws and rules, just a genuine belief and love of a real and powerful God.

The things I have experienced since coming to this church are incredible. I was miraculously healed from asthma – God INSTANTLY took every symptom away. I went from taking steroid inhalers twice a day and ventolin inhalers whenever I did exercise to nothing and I have not needed to use an inhaler since. God has given me joy, peace, health and a purpose to live for.

I did not experience these things before because I did not know how real and powerful God is. It was only after coming to this church and experiencing the REAL Jesus that I found true fulfilment and true LIFE.

He saved me, He healed me and He gave me purpose – He will do the same for you. Have you experienced the REAL Jesus?

Sam

I grew up in a very religious, catholic church and like almost all of my friends, I stopped believing. There simply was no reason to believe, I never heard about a ‘personal relationship’ with God either. I became really sure there was no God and that I could do everything I wanted to do, without God, all by myself. Not knowing how much more is possible with him.

Then, about a year ago, I came to Exeter. During fresher’s week, when almost everyone I met was drunk, I was surprised to find Nooma, a perfect place to escape the rush of the first week. I met some great people there, people that were loving and caring, without even knowing me. I kept going to Nooma every week, still not believing, yet realizing there was something more about these people.

A few weeks later I was walking home after Nooma, when God revealed himself to me. So powerfull. Years of disbelief were blown away in a few seconds. It changed my life completely. He did not only save my day, he saved my year, he saved my future.

Korneel.

A poll conducted in the USA out of 1008 people in weekly church attendance found overall 32% were men and 44% were women; averaged over Catholics: Men = 26%, Women = 49% and Protestants: Men = 42%, Women 50%. [View the source here] The Christian Broadcasting Network publishes articles like, “Why Men Hate Church” [source] It’s reporter writes,

“Cliff is a man’s man. On the job he’s known as a go-getter and a very hard worker. He’s a good provider who loves his wife and kids. He’s well respected by his neighbours. Cliff drives a homogenous four-wheel-drive pickup. He loves the outdoors and takes every opportunity for a little hunting and fishing. He enjoys a cold beer and a dirty joke. He does not go to church. Ask him why he doesn’t go to church, and he’ll offer up words like boring, irrelevant, and hypocrite. But the real reason Cliff doesn’t go to church is that he’s already practising another religion. That religion is masculinity. The ideology of masculinity has replaced Christianity as the true religion of men. We live in a society with a female religion and a male religion: Christianity, of various sorts, for women and non-masculine men; and masculinity . . . for men. Cliff practices his religion with a single-mindedness the Pharisees would envy. His work, his hobbies, his entertainment, his follies, his addictions, everything he does is designed to prove to the world he is a man. His religion also demands that he avoid anything that might call his manhood into question. This includes church, because Cliff believes deep in his heart that church is something for women and children, not men. Cliff is not alone. Men have believed this for centuries. In the 1800s, Charles Spurgeon said, “There has got abroad a notion, somehow, that if you become a Christian you must sink your manliness and turn milksop.” Cliff sees Christianity as incongruous with his manhood. It’s a women’s thing.”

In the UK it is no different. The CathNews laments the decline of the voice of men with a headline that reads, “Men want ‘macho songs’ in church. [source] The 2007 Church Attitudes Survey reports that “there is a gender gap, or disparity, within the UK Church: men now constitute between 35% and 40% of churchgoers.” [source] That makes the church as a whole 60% women on a good day when the men show up. The feminisation of the church is a reflection of the feminisation of our society as a whole. The death of the masculine voice in the church is not a unique thing of its own but is rather a reflection of what is happening in our British society as a whole. “The proportion of all households comprising a mother and father with dependent children fell from 38% in 1961 to 23% in 2001.” [source] Out of the other 75% of our children will be raised by their mothers as a constant while only 2% will be raised by their fathers as a constant. The voice of our children’s daddies has been lost in their homes so no wonder it has been lost in the church.

On the other hand we don’t want a masculine Christianity either. PamBG [source], a female Methodist minister and Dave Warnock, British Methodist minister and Christian blogger warns of such ‘idolatry’ entering into the church. In his article, “Why have men left the Church?” [source], he argues as does CBN, that the pastorate as a whole is almost 95% men. Dave writes, “In many Churches women cannot be elders, priests, ministers, bishops, archbishops, cardinals, popes etc. Even in Churches which have an official position of equality we are nowhere near achieving this in practice. Consider the relative numbers of women ministers, superintendents and district chairs in the British Methodist Church and you will see it lags a long way behind the men. The same is usually the case for lay committees and positions of authority. Those that claim that Churches are feminine have clearly missed the point that if this is the case then it is men who have made it so and hence that this seems an unlikely reason for there to be few men in the church.”

Dave writes in another article, “A church should have a masculine ethos (or not)”, “In short to claim that this simile justifies a masculine ethos for the church is plain ludicrous. It also gives a dangerous edge to the idea of being courageous and one that disenfranchises at a stroke 50% of the worlds population. It is worth remembering that God is NOT male. Becoming masculine does not make us like God. Even the ESV and KJV record that in Genesis 1:27 God created male and female in His image. [source] The problem is of course further frustrated by the fact that ‘masculine’ is interpreted differently in different cultures and in different generations within the same culture.

The answer lies in both male and female becoming Christlike without abandoning our masculinity or femininity. Male must not be feminised, neutered or silenced but be celebrated and take it’s place in the home and in the home and the church each fulfilling their God-given roles and responsibilities. At TRDC we MUST turn the tide back to the Bible and not allow culture dominate and dictate who we are and what we are becoming but allow Kingdom rule to literally rule over our lives. The voice of the men must be heard in the house. We cannot be ashamed to rise up and celebrate who we are. Although your male body is here, you as a man MUST show up!!! What we have done in church life is get men saved but they’re saved men with lost voices. Men I wish you knew how potent your voice is – to your faith, to your family, to your community and to your church. I wish I could explain to you how God has given the male voice prominence and pre-eminence. It is the father that must name his children and speak to their identity as men and women. It was Zacchariah who had to report what Heaven had said, “His name is John.” Lk 1:63 It was Joseph who was told by God, “you shall call his name Jesus.” Matt 1:17 The voice of God in a man’s voice has Heaven behind it!

Over the past weeks whenever I have mentioned HE SAVED THE DAY Pastor Scott has led the men in a spirited Ooh-Rah. It is most commonly used to respond to a verbal greeting or as an expression of enthusiasm. [source] Have the men responded or shown up? One or three at most with the rest cowering in embarrassment and cowardice at this display of brotherhood and comeraderie – even by the so-called ‘real men’ among us. Proof enough that you are a neutralised soldier in the army of God. Proof enough that we have a way to go to find our voice and make it heard. If you do not echo with Scott then what is your problem? We are supposed to be the people of God where the “shout of a King is among them”. For our men we cant even hear our KING whimper. If Jericho was to be taken by us I wonder how afraid it’s inhabitants would have been when they heard God’s instructions to the men in Josh 6:5, “all the people shall shout with a great shout; then the wall of the city will fall down flat. And the people shall go up every man straight before him.” Not very if they heard us on a Sunday! Men of faith know that there is a shout of faith in faith – it is the shout of victory! There is something that hell cannot tolerate on the earth and it is the sound of the believing men roaring on the earth.

This last two years I have silently changed the face of the church bringing men alongside women and women alongside men in almost every department. From the Children’s Church through to the greeters at the door I have required both men and women to serve alongside each other. Now that we have almost completed the process we must declare war on the silent, absent and feminised voice in our church.

It’s always amazing to me how even though we can sing some of the most awesomely anointed praise and worship songs in our church that any man can really connect, it is still the sound of the women’s voice that drowns out the men’s voice Sunday after Sunday. This is so demonic – the voice of our men gripped by the demonic and silenced because if you think about it, even in the natural a man’s voice is naturally stronger and louder than a woman’s voice. Praise is always audible, visible and vocal and if you look across the worshippers at TRDC on any Sunday it is the women who lead the way in grabbing our attention of their devotion before the Lord. How unlike this was of one of the greatest worshippers of all time – King David – who led the way of the nation without care or concern as to who thought what of him and even declared to his own wife, “And I will be even more undignified than this, and will be humble in my own sight.” 2Sam 6:22 This means a public humbling of self in the presence of God amongst the congregation of His people. At TRDC it is not uncommon to see our men during worship with mouths shut, arms folded, eyes glazed and even sitting down. These same men are completely different around their secular music where they will worship with wild abandon. What religious hypocrisy we tolerate in our own lives! Men, we MUST show up during praise and worship and like David, lead the way.

When I teach and preach the Word apart from two of our pastors the voice of the women are heard shouting Amen’s of encouragement to their Pastor and Shepherd. Where are the Amen’s from the men of the House? It’s not that I’m emotionally connecting to the hearers of the Word but the affirmation of the men in the house does three things: 1] it draws on the anointing residing on the preacher and 2] encourages those within the house to connect to the message you are giving approval to and 3] our children rise to the voice of the brothers, sons, fathers and pastors in the House. These same men will sit in front of their favourite sports team and lose their voice for all the shouting at their heroes – albeit whether they’re winning or losing, but are silent neutralised soldiers in the House of God. In the book of Revelation the 24 Elders lead and represent the entire congregation of the redeemed who constantly shout, “Amen! Alleluia!”

From the parking attendant to the greeters to the ushers to the worship team to the preachers, both adult and childrens’, to the prayer the voice of Godly men MUST arise in the House of God; be heard and not be silent. Jesus is called the Lion of the tribe of Judah. Just as the king of the jungle makes his presence known by his mighty roar so must the kings of the King of Kings let heaven, earth and hell know that Daddy’s home.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=HVp-5Zq9iJ0

Richard Branson posted this video at the beginning of the week. If you don’t know who Archbishop Desmond TuTu is, he was instrumental in the pulling down of apartheid in South Africa. I have all the respect in the world for this man who has stayed the course, and in his old age continues to speak out against Mugabe, was well as against the western countries that do nothing to intervene.

This video, whilst on one level speaking in regard to the much publicised Islamic treatment of Women in Sharia Law, for me speaks about the measure of a man, because multitudes have watched and will watch this video, and smile as they know they do not hit their wife, or hurt women, and therefore feel justified. But I want to ask every man in the world a question…

How do you treat women?

I know many who will not hit their wife, but they will cut her down with harsh words, belittling her so that this poor excuse for a man can have some feeling of power. I know other men who will not harm a women, but talk trash about her at the office all day and gossip behind her back.

Some men will treat their sister with respect, but treat any other women as if she were an inanimate object to attain and throw away. Our magazine racks and television screens overflow with women paraded as animals who live only to fulfill lustful desires, men ranking them solely on their ability to gratify their insatiable quench for pleasure, as if they lack any other inherent value such as personality, strength, tenderness and warmth.

I see and hear men talk about women like they are chickens crammed into some coop in some battery farm, harvested for their bodies, and their well being cast aside as collateral damage and an unfortunate side product. My own cousins tell me they have lost count of their ‘conquests’, laughingly and arrogantly confessing that somewhere, in all likelihood, is a child they’ve unwittingly fathered.

Oh, they don’t hit women, but the bruises left on the women of our nation are clear. The broken bones of our fractured society are not accidental. The nine and ten year old girls in miniskirts, hunting around the shopping mall for boys, are no coincidence. I’ve seen single mother after single mother come through our church, and despite all the hurt than men have inflicted her, cannot imagine any other way that men would desire her than for her body and what it can do for them. And I have seen with my own eyes that their children, in turn, grow up with the same impression.

And it is with unbelief that, that when I ask and seek to bring understanding, not one of these men considers they have done any wrong.

How do you treat women?

I grew up in a christian home with fantastic parents. Although I believed from a young age that God was real, I had little more than a religious relationship with Him. I would turn up on a Sunday and I would read the bible and pray every now and then because of a guilty feeling.

I grew up in a hard school, and was bullied a lot, both because of what I believed and because they didn’t know any better. When I decided to go to college I wanted a change. I decided to be the one who fitted in and was not trodden on. However all I felt was bitterness, and this grew along with a deep depression. I was so sarcastic people would just sit around me to hear the tirade of whatever I decided to cut down with my tongue.

At the same time, I was living the ‘life’ I was partying and getting drunk, always seeking to fit in and to be excepted. But I was denying who I was, I still would turn up on a Sunday and I still believed God was real, but I never really lived my life for Him. I had no purpose and my depression grew deeper.

At uni I continued to live this way, but slowly the Lord drew me into His church through the motivation of my family and a large part due to my own self-frustration. At the end of my first year I left uni for the summer still depressed at my lack of purpose wondering what the point of me being there was and why God brought me to such a void and empty place. But during the course of the summer God revealed to me that the void and emptiness was not in Exeter, but in me. I decided to go for God and I have since recovered completely from depression, I have purpose, I am more secure with who I am than ever before, i love prayer and the bible and just want to follow Christ with all I have. He Saved The Day For Me!

My life got stuck in a rat race of bigger… bigger house, bigger car, bigger wine collection, bigger stereo, bigger belly, bigger TV, bigger house again, bigger title, bigger holiday, 2 cars (and bigger), bigger garden, bigger everything. 
Life was all about my bigger things; it was all hope I had – just bigger!

Then His voice came: …”move to Exeter; get trained…”! – so I did; packed up the career, the house, the cars, the things.. and the family.
The ups and downs are still there; but He saved my day; and with Him guiding, leading, teaching and training me – we did it! 
(all I actually did was make the decision; He pretty much did the rest!).
He saved my day.

Loving Jesus, loving fun, loving life – let’s have a party!
Olav

I grew up a Christian with no vision or real living for Christ in my life – like so many men, I was just going wherever life took me – never actually pursuing Christ.

At a crossroads, when University was my next move, Christ saved my future from the auto-pilot I was on, and put me onto the path that follows HIS calling.

Years later, married and wanting to buy a house, I had got back into auto-pilot. But God challenged me to trust Him for a house – a complete impossibility.

As I dared to believe and stepped out onto the water in faith, God met me. He saved my future again from a purposeless, non-victorious life, and gave me a testimony that I can tell everyone about.

Countless are the instances where I understand that the way He Save My Day was by saving me from MYSELF.

At the same time as a raw police re-cruit at 22, I was in a relationship with a girl whom I thought the world of, some one who I though could eventually marry. Due to various problems the relaitionship ended .
It was on the evening coming home on the motorway from Bristol (uk) down to Exmouth my emotions got the better of me and broke down.
My own world that I had built up around me was now in ruins. I happened to be parked in a motorway service station car park at the time and I spent some time mulling over my future plans.
Being the wreck that I was at that time I asked God to do something in my life. To my surprise I heard a voice say “go back to your youth group” a simple instruction, a calm voice, a simple direction which was the first time the realm of Jesus was real to me. I was shown a vision of a castle portcullis with hands and arms trying to reach out to me from the other side, I knew from this vision / picture, that I was now on safer territory.
From that defining moment asking Jesus in to my life and through a jigsaw pattern of plans and purposes, people and places, I now live and move and have my being different to that of 29 years ago.

Looking back from that defining moment, I would have never dreamt that I would be doing the exciting things I do today if it wasn’t for God’s intervention in presenting His Son to me, Being born anew has changed my veiw on many aspects of life, eternal grateful, to The real Jesus

This is my story, and It’s always still under continuing development,
Graham (Exeter.UK)

We cry with one united voice like Joshua and Caleb did while many other men shrunk away in cowardice from the task that God had envisioned them with, “We are well able”. [Num 13:30] Men ‘we are well able’ is the shout that cries from deep within us to the challenges that confront us. We see our enemies possessing ‘our land’ and having heard the voice of our Captain, without fear, we immediately resonate with Him in the spirit ‘we are well able’ to do that which You have tasked us with.

2 Tim 1:7 – For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control.

One of our brothers in arms, the apostle Paul, spoke to the heart of a fellow soldier of the cross, Timothy, great strength and courage to not be found wanting, weak or AWOL from his responsibilities as a fellow brother in arms of the Cross. These words must permeate you and strengthen you to courageous action. “A coward dies a thousand deaths, a soldier dies but one”. [Dillinja] Unlike cowards we die but once – when the will of God is complete in our lives! With boldness and courage we step up and are counted among the brave of heart rather than cower in the shadows of shame, silence or smug selfishness. It’s the coward that pees on the seat and doesn’t wipe it up; it’s the coward that leaves a mess for others to clean up after them; it’s the coward that vents at absent others but will not face them with dignity and respect; it’s the coward that abuses his wife and never apologises for being a bully; it’s the coward that will not grab his wife’s hand and calm the stormy seas of life with gentle prayer; it’s the coward that provokes their children to wrath and dont quench the burning fires in their wounded souls with words of love and nurture; it’s the coward that calls himself a follower of Christ but doesn’t daily open his Bible to hear the voice of his Leader; it’s the coward that criticises but never lifts a finger to be a part of the solution; it’s the coward that embraces the life produced out of the local church but wont sow their life into it; it’s the coward who wants care, love, friendship and family from their church but remain aloof and isolated from them; it’s the coward…

The Strongs concordance tells us that the Greek word for ‘sound mind’ in 2Tim 1:7 is ‘an admonishing or calling to soundness of mind, to moderation and self-control’. We have been given a ‘spirit’ of self-discipline. When we were born again, written into the DNA of our new creation, is a strand called self-discipline or self-control. We can help it. We can do something about it.

Ez 36:26 I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.

It is with this new creation that our spirit man calls out in the face of any adversity and challenge ‘we are well able’. We must allow this DNA strand’s voice to BOOM within the chambers of our lives like a regimental sergeant on a battleground and drown the tiny negative voices of doubt, fear, laziness, negative experiences of failure, comfort, unbelief and contrary counsel of ‘well meaning’ friends and loved ones that want to prevent us from initiating our own personal revival to greater things in God. We have a spirit of self-discipline: the ability to rule the direction of your thoughts, actions and behaviour from your spirit man, without bowing your knee at the altar of an excuse culture that is worshipped by the voice flesh and carnal mind.

I am asking you to connect with the voice of the Spirit that says “we are well able” in your life and press into the things of God He is admonishing us to in the coming weeks and months. Do not put your life on hold until He Saved The Day and use it as an initiator to get on with the Life of Christ in your life. Initiate today that which God is calling us to. Together we say, “Let us go up at once and take possession, for we are well able to overcome it.” Book the dates off from work now to be a part of HE SAVED THE DAY.

We are keen to talk to you – so leave comments – and follow us on Twitter.

We want to hear your stories of how Jesus saved your day. Perhaps He saved your marriage, perhaps your future. For others maybe He saved your health, and for us all, He saved our lives.

These testimonies below are not the words of the unexperienced – they are from real lives that have gone through trials and tribulations, and come out like gold refined in the fire. For sure, God save their day.

How did He save yours?